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Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The Old Age Rag

It started this afternoon. SWMBO was taking a nap and I was paying a handful of bills. I had a couple of life insurance payments due. (Sidebar: I first got these two policies, relatively small ones, when I was about 18. My dad bought them for me because he thought it was important for me to have them. I've been paying on them for . . oh, man, almost 50 years now. As I was writing another check, I thought of how much money the company had received from me over the years and of how little my heirs are going to get out of it. But . . that's another story.)

Anyway, I was paying my bills chronologically according to when they were due. When I wrote out the check for the second insurance payment and put it in an envelope, I suddenly realized I couldn't find the envelope and payment for the first payment. I began looking all over. I went through a large trash basket several times. I went through my receipts file at least 4 or 5 times. Finally, SWMBO woke up and came in and I said "I have a mystery for you to solve."

So she went through the trash basket. I went through the receipts file again. I looked under my computer monitor, under the CPU, under my printer, under my bed, all around the desk on the floor. I had previously . . . because I was also doing my weekly chore of cleaning out the cat pans and refilling them . . . been through the entire house and garage, tracing my tracks. I even went out into the back yard and took a look around. I went out to the mailbox to see if I had taken the envelope out there.

Nothing.

Somewhere late in here I shouted "There's another one missing." The check for the company who picks up our trash also is missing. This caused yet another search of, now, all the old familiar places.

SWMBO finally gave up and said "Just write another couple of checks, put them in an envelope and mail them."

"But", I said, "what if I end up paying them twice?"

"You won't", she said, "the 'lost' ones will eventually turn up."

After a few more rounds of the house, I succumbed to this logic. I was in the closet, getting a couple of envelopes out and looking once again in the drawer where I keep the stamps . . thinking that I might have laid the envelopes in there . . when it came to me.

I had written these two checks out earlier this morning and mailed them.

Oh, shit.

I have a birthday coming up in less than a month.

And . . . this is a symptom of old age.

Shit.

9 comments:

  1. Oh shit.... I think that means I'm getting old before my time. I do stuff like this on a regular basis...

    Say it isn't so.

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  2. Ah, Tombo, you have miles to go before you sleep!

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  3. Shit indeed! Very scary stuff. On the other hand, you did eventually remember having posted them!
    I pay all the bills by phone using Bpay- don't know if you have that. I am dreading the day, when I cant remember all the effing numbers I have to punch in, to pay each bill. Gom won't learn how!

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  4. At least you eventually remembered that you'd paid them. I do stuff like that all the time - without remembering what I actually did. I call it having 'a senile moment'. :-D x

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  5. Now I am really worried about myself. I do stuff like this all the time. I have to watch myself like a hawk when it comes to anything involving paper or money.

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  6. Meggie - I do a variant of that, paying most of my bills on-line. The edge of my monitor is nearly covered with post-it notes reminding me of passwords.

    Kitty - The "senile moments" seem closer together to me than they used to be!

    Mike - With what you have on your mind (no, not the girly pictures!) I'm not surprised.

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  7. I tend to blame my tendency to do, or not do, a lot of very forgetful things on too much cannabis in a mis-spent youth. I fear this may be a pathetic excuse.

    Worrying about it only makes it worse.

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  8. Alas! I've become dependent on writing everything down and when I leave the house to run errands, I always forget something or other...

    I love the Grackles too, Cat. There's just something so cheerful and jaunty in both their manner and their song.

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  9. Lucy - Wow! The confessions, the confessions!

    Brain - I do that too. At least, I write down the things I remember at the time.

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