TUESDAY - DAY TWO

Yes that's right - it's TWOs-DAY.

Not only Tuesday but day two of the Christmas Comedy Cavalcade.

So without further ado, prepare yourselves to be amused.

(Think: the little drummer boy)

Ho-Ho-Ho!

A BIG DAY

I bet you just thought it was Monday, right?

Well, it is that but not only that.

Today is the 90th birthday of one of my favorite actresses.

Wishing a Happy Birthday to Dame Judi Dench!

While living with macular degeneration affecting her eyesight, Ms. Dench said recently that she hates the thought of retirement because she's deadly afraid of boredom.

And, while not enjoying talking about turning 90, she also said she hopes to live to 100.

I hope her wish comes true.

Now, though I have teased you a bit about the current season, I'm afraid I cannot hold off any further.

Thus we start the Christmas Comedy Cavalcade.

May your holidays be bright!

THE FRIDAY FUNNIES

 Ring-ding-a-ding.

Ting-ting-a-ling.

Rum-bum-bum-bum.

Oh, sorry, I've just been getting into that Christmas spirit.

Or was it spirits?

I was in a store yesterday that was so clogged with Poinsettia bushes and Russell Stover chocolates that it was difficult to get past the Christmas shoppers.

And it's only the 6th of December!

My Humor Elves have been hard at work loading me up with Christmas-themed cartoons and memes but I'm only going to burden you with one today and save the rest for later in the month.

Let's see . . . um . . .oh, how about this one . . .  just to get you in the mood.

Now YOU can sing along too.

Ring-ring-a-ding.

Bop-bop-a-dop.

Ching-ching-a-ling.

Heh-heh-heh.

All right, friends, relatives and countrymen, my work is just about done.

For this week.

The weekend is up to you.

Make it a great one!

And always remember to keep laughing!

Here, kitty-kitty . . .

( . . . yup . . . )

THE ELVES NEVER SLEEP

 This arrived by email a few minutes ago from one of the contributors to the Humor Bank and I feel it's just too good to keep.

XMAS DECOR?

'tis the season.

But not everyone decorates the same way.

For example, I stopped by a house where there were a lot of decorations of a non-traditional type.

Happy Holidays, whatever you're celebrating.

AGAINST ALL ODDS

Allow me to introduce you to Snappy the Snapdragon.

When we moved in he was already there, a little plant growing between the edge of the sidewalk and some rocks that line the front yard.

The soil he's growing in is covered in crushed granite.

It gets little rain.

Let me remind you that this is Arizona.

For a while I would give him some water whenever I would think of it.

But not often and then I quit watering him altogether.

But that doesn't seem to discourage him and now, more than two years since we moved here, he continues to resist the vagaries of extremely hot summers and cold winters.

He continues to bloom cheerfully in spite of all our inattention.

He is a lesson in resistance.

He is Snappy the Snapdragon.

May he thrive forever!

THE FRIDAY FUNNIES

I just bet y'all thought there wouldn't be any Funnies this week after all of those days of turkey jokes.

But you know not the conscientious focus I put into this job of mine.

And it helps to have a band of Elves who never seem to sleep as they continue to supply me with the fodder I dish out each week.

But first, on a serious and personal note, I was not served that pineapple for my Thanksgiving feast yesterday.

That was just a gag photo my chief cook and order giver dreamed up.

Well, we did have the pineapple but it was chopped up and combined with roasted sweet potatoes.

And we did NOT have turkey!

We had our traditional roasted pork loin and Judy's homemade dressing and mashed potatoes and gravy and air-fried Brussels sprouts and hot dinner rolls and olives and pickles and a crunchy top cherry pie (that Marie Callender supplied) with whipped topping and it was all fantastically delicious.

Dinner was accented with an Argentine Malbec wine.

What the hey, you only get one Thanksgiving Feast a year so why not go all out?

Whatever you all dined on, I hope it was as wonderful.

Now that we've got that serious business out of the way, let's get on to the real content you keep coming back for.

And on that gotcha moment, I will urge you to take an uncompromising approach to all those Thanksgiving leftovers, using every bit of your energy with unanimity and unbridled passion.

Eat well and have a universally ultra weekend!

And always remember to keep laughing!

Here, kitty-kitty . . .

( . . . ah, I've trained him well . . . )