A NEW BEGINNING

The Christmas Holiday is finally over, though some places are still closed today.

Perhaps to recover from hangovers?

As noted above, it feels like a new beginning to me.

I know those feelings are not supposed to set in until January First or Second but it has come early to me.

We had a very quiet Christmas Day, just the two of us here.

The indomitable SWMBO was in full battle mode in the kitchen much of the day, producing a delicious dinner of baked ham, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes and gravy, warm dinner rolls.

And she moaned because she hadn't provided a green vegetable to go with all of that food.

Lordy!

Every year after one of these feasts, she declares that will be the last holiday meal she prepares.

"It just doesn't make sense to go to all that trouble when it's just the two of us!", she says.

But then the next holiday rolls around and away she goes again.

We had a visit from the BAD and a companion on Christmas Eve in the afternoon.

Drinks and finger foods were consumed.

And then the BAD lived up to her acronym by producing these two "gifts".

Treachery!

I had warned her the last time not to ever bring another jigsaw puzzle into our house!

But had she listened?

Apparently so because as I ranted and raved at this malicious act, she just sat there and LAUGHED at me!

Two puzzles!

One of them has 500 pieces, the other ONE THOUSAND!

She's trying to drive me mad, I tell you.

Oh well, eventually I shall relent and we will get them out and solve them.

We may be even more doddering when that trial is over but we shall solve the bloody things.

So, (pant, pant), how was your Christmas?

A HOLIDAY DRINKING SONG

I tasted wassail once, in my younger days.

Wretched stuff!

CHRISTMAS DAY

 To one and to all

a very Merry Christmas!

vigilia di Natale - THE COUNT IS OVER!

 Hark!

Did I just hear the tintinnabulation of tiny sleigh bells?

For sure, many places in the world heard them.

It is (finally) Christmas Eve.

I bet you thought this asinine countdown/countup of mine would never end.

But it has and I thank you all for your patience, your comments, your friendship and your good humor/humour through the preceding year and, in fact, years.

So, let the merrymaking begin in earnest.

Happy Christmas and Best Wishes to celebrants of all those other holidays at this time of year!

SANTA DAY - PARTE UNDICI

 Today is Part Eleven of my imbecilic Marking off of the Days until Christmas.

Intelligent readers of this blog (and I know you ALL are) will note that there are only two more days until the fat old man in the red and white suit deposits packages of swag under holiday trees all over the world.

I wonder how he does that.

Those reindeer must be really fast.

At any rate, this is the final Saturday Shopping Splurge Cycle before the big event.

Also known as The Day Men Finally Break Down and Shop!

So don't let me hold you from the Centers of Commerce.

Make like those reindeer and hurry!

APPROACHING - PARTE DECIMA - THE FRIDAY FUNNIES

 It's the tenth day of this ill-thought-out March Toward Christmas.

I don't know about you but I'm getting more than a little sick of it.

But here at the International Headquarters of Oddball Observations, I throw myself (and my co-conspirators contributors) into the fray.

Hmm, I wonder what "fray" means.

Oh well, whatever it means, here are your end-of-the-week enterainments.

I hope you were delighted with this silly string of sidesplitting slapstick.

And I hope that you will have a sensibly insane weekend.

Remember, Santa is coming.

Oh, and always, always, always remember to keep laughing!

Here, kitty-kitty . . .

( . . . or is it kitties . . . )

NEARING - PARTE NOVE

 You may notice that I am no longer using the word "countdown" in my derisory "Countdown to Christmas" . . .

Oh drat, there I did it again.

Oh well, call it a "countdown" or, what it actually is, a "count-up" and I'll just stand on the sidelines and watch the fun.

Because fun, you see, is what this is all about.

Or removing the first comma makes that sentence even more meaningful.

Because "fun you see" is really what this is about.

And now that I've nattered for way too long, here it is.

DA DUM, DA DUM - PARTE OTTO

In our continuing program of Education for the Elderly it has been pointed out to me that a "countdown" means that the numbers are reduced each day.

i.e. (id est, for you Latin lovers) 5-4-3-2-1.

Whereas while I have been referring to my absurd ticking off the days until Christmas arrives as a "countdown", I actually have been increasing the number of days left each day.

So what I have been doing is NOT a "countdown".

It is, in reality, a "count-up".

I shall not identify the pedantic chap who pointed this out to me to save him from being slurred, threatened and perhaps stoned in public.

And besides, I should get points for doing my "count" in Italian.

Ergo, we shall point out that today is Day Eight in my CountUp to Christmas and here's your daily dash of drollery.

GETTING CLOSER - PARTE SETTIMA

 It's the seventh day of my wretched Countdown to Christmas and I have declined the suggestion of London based Steve Reed to announce the day in Icelandic rather than Italian.

I mean, how would you pronounce Sjöti Hluti anyway?

So we shall continue our language lessons from the land of pizza and pasta.

And, by the way, inject some holiday humor into your humdrum schedule.

ONE WEEK TO GO - PARTE SESTA

 I hope you all are appreciating your Italian lessons as I continue my supercilious Countdown to Christmas.

It's next Monday, y'know, and Joy of Joys - another three day weekend!

So let us continue to put some Christmas spirit into your jaded selves.

(Note: I did not say "elves".)

XMAS - PARTE QUINTA

 I have a little classwork for you today.

First, you have to look at yesterday's post and then find Granny Sue's comment.

Then come back for this:

Next, you have to find Debby's comment yesterday and then come back for this:

That is all.

You may now resume your holiday joyfulness.

C-DAY - PARTE QUARTA

 Yes, it's Day Four of my ridiculous Countdown to Christmas.

Here's your Daily Dose of Drollery.

THE FRIDAY FUNNIES (CHRISTMAS - PARTE TERZA)

 In case you've been wondering what those strange words are in my Post Titles (and I know that you have but you're all just too polite to inquire about them) and you're not a polymath like the Cheerful Monk, it's Italian.

And each one tells you what day it is in my ridiculous Countdown to Christmas.

For example, today is Parte Terza.

Or Part Three.

Oh the lengths we Senile Senior Citizens go to amuse ourselves.

At any rate, it's not only Parte Terza or Part Three or the Third Day of my inane Countdown to Christmas, it's (more importantly) FRIDAY!

And you know what that means.

(And if you don't, you just haven't been paying attention.)

So that's it for your Festive Friday, full of fun and frolic.

Now I want you all to forget the shopping, the decorating, the cooking and cleaning, and try to have yourselves a wonderful carefree weekend.

And always remember to keep laughing!

(No matter how hard it is.)

Here, kitty-kitty . . .

CHRISTMAS - SECONDA PARTE

Dreams are the strangest things, don't you think?

For some reason when I woke this morning I realized I had been dreaming about an international Zoom call between a friend of mine and her son in some foreign land.

But before she could even say "Hello", he joyfully blasted music out through the ether to her.

But the r-e-a-l-l-y strange part of this dream was that the music was "Papa Loves Mambo"!

That's a song I haven't heard or thought of in years and I had to Google it to find the most popular version of it was recorded by Perry Como in 1954!

Now try to explain that because I sure can't.

And if I started the earworm for you just understand that I've had it going through my head for hours.

So, you're welcome.

And now let's continue our countdown to Christmas.

CHRISTMAS - PARTE UNO

 Okay, you've got me.

I know, I know, it's the Christmas season.

There are a lot of other holidays being celebrated now too, y'know.

But Christmas tops them all, it seems, so let us begin.

And while you're enjoying the following, think of Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Bodhi Day, and Zarathosht Diso.

If you're not acquainted with these the Almighty, All-Knowing Google is a good reference point.

Okay, I said "let us begin" and let's.

Happy Holidays, everyone!

TOO GOOD TO SAVE

 My Christmas elves have been busy and one of them sent this to me a few minutes ago.

I laughed (groaned) and instantly knew I couldn't hang onto it until Friday.

CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS

 It's that time of year once again.

Christmas Season, when people for some unexplained reason put colored lights and inflatable (or not) decorations in front of their places of residence.

For example, here is a photo taken last night in snowy Minot, North Dakota.

That's the home of my cousin, Cherie, who always decorates to the max.

It's a tradition that goes back decades, to when her late father used to clamber around on the roof well into his 80's putting lighted reindeer and Santas and sleighs up there.

Fortunately my cousin, who is only a few months younger than I am, hasn't continued that tradition.

When I spoke to her last night I told her it looked like Las Vegas.

She said "thank you"!

And I have no idea what those blue blotches are supposed to represent.

I could only think "snowflakes" and Elvis Presley's song "Blue Christmas".

Oh well, it gives her joy and she has a nephew to do the decorating for her.

Down here in Arizona many people do the same, lighting up the neighborhood with elaborate displays.

On the other hand, here's the extent of my outside decorating.

Give me some credit.

At least I didn't put out a lighted "Bah, Humbug" sign.

GOODIES

I made Snickerdoodles yesterday.

A traditional holiday cinnamon cookie.

The only problem was that the recipe only makes a dozen and a half and they're going fast with just the two of us spoiling ourselves.

I've been thinking I may have to make another batch today!

THE FRIDAY FUNNIES

Lost anything?

Good news: today is Lost and Found Day!

Well, it's also the second day of Hanukkah.

And it's Jim Morrison's birthday, even though he's not around to celebrate it.

But one who will be celebrating a birthday today is Onika Tanya Maraj, who was born in Port of Spain, Trinidad and Tobago, on this day in 1982.

Oh, she changed her name awhile back.

It's Nicki Minaj now.

Lessee, oh yeah, I almost forgot: here in America it's National Lard Day.

But more important, it's National Brownie Day - eat up!

And of most absolutely outstanding importance: it's Friday!

But, sorry to say, it's a Friday for Word Humor.

Meaning, no cartoons.

So suck it up, fellow comedy lovers.

No, no, wait, don't do that, I'm not through yet!

Okay, I'll give you one cartoon.

Now I hope you're satisfied.

Maybe we can all get on with our day.

So here's my wish.

I wish you all will apply yourselves to the task at hand: having an exemplary weekend.

And always remember to keep laughing!

Here, kitty-kitty . . .

( . . oh so you've brought a friend, have you . . )